Me..

So being my first blog post I'm a little bit unsure where to start, but I'm just going to wing it and hope it turns out how it is in my head! I'll start with an introduction. I am a 21 year old female living with depression. Of course that's not the only interesting thing about me and its not how I usually identify myself to people, "Hi, I'm 21 and living with depression, who are you?", but seeing as this blog is about my journey into and out of depression and self harm it seemed appropriate! I also like to go for long walks, I love to read, I love my family and I am passionate about helping others who are going through something similar to what I did.

For a long time I considered myself broken. Too broken to be fixed and certainly too broken to be loved.. or so I thought! I fell into depression when I was 15. It was gradual at first. I just thought I was having a bad day, and then a few bad days and a few bad months and before I knew it I could barely scrape up the energy to get out of bed in the morning. I spent hours just sitting and staring at nothing, unsure if I would ever be able to feel again. It wasn't until I was 20 that I finally realised that I wasn't broken, I was just cracked. Sure some of those cracks seemed more like giant chasms that I would never be able to pull back together but to me cracked could be fixed. A cracked cup will still be useful, it might leak from time to time and it might not work quite as well as it should but it can be fixed. That cracked line, that scar, will always be there but it will no longer be the dominating feature. And that is how I am today, I still have those cracks in my heart, some just filled in, some pulled back together and some still gaping. The scars still sit on my arms, a reminder everyday that I was stronger, that I overcame, that I am BRAVE.

With this blog I hope to heal some of my own wounds by expressing it through words. I also hope that it might help other people battling through the nothingness that is depression and maybe give them the hope and encouragement to keep going. I aim to talk about my own journey, the different tactics I used to cope from day to day, and other issues surrounding this topic. If I can help just one person with their battle, stop just one person from giving up, then it is all worthwhile.

Stay STRONG xx